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Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.
Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.
Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.

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Comments

  1. Karina Shevchenko says

    I never even knew this existed but I’m so relieved. For the past week or so my little guy has been sleeping decently at night (as usual) from 12am-8 or 9am, only waking up once or twice to feed. Usually around 4. But what has changed are his naps during the day! I used to get steady 2 or 3 hr naps, now I get 30min-1 hr naps if I’m lucky! He just turned 3 months old today… is it possible he can be going through this regression?

    • Debbye @ The Baby Sleep Site says

      Hi @ Karina – Thanks for visiting us! yes, the 4 month sleep regression can DEFINITELY being early, and based on what you wrote, it does sound like that may be what is going on! Hang in there and I hope that those short naps lengthen again soon!

  2. Preksha says

    hi @janelle

    Her schedule depends on what time she wakes up. I’ve been writing it down for the past two weeks and notice that
    she usually wakes up between 6 and 7 am – if she wakes up before 6:30, she takes her first nap within 45 mins, if she wakes up after 6:30 then usually takes the first nap after 75-90 mins.

    Wake 6:00-7:00 am
    Awake for 45-90 mins (depending on wake time)
    Nap 1 – 1.5 hours
    Awake for 75-90 mins
    Nap 2 – 1 – 1.5 hour
    Awake for 75-90 mins
    Nap 3 – 45 mins/1 hour
    Awake for 2.5-3 hours (most active at this time)
    Bedtime routine: 5:30 PM
    Sleep 6:00-6:30 PM

    She tends to frontload her naps.

    Another quick question – shes 4.5 months old – is it too early for controlled crying? I would much prefer not making her cry – she’s transitioned to falling asleep on her own for all her naps without tears – but she doesnt do that when she wakes up at night and sometimes troubles even at bedtime (not too often).

    Do you think I should just keep trying the no-cry method? Its day 11 today but this includes three extra days – i had to repeat day 1-3 for consistency’s sake when we moved to our new apartment on day 3 of the weaning off rocking.

    Thanks a lot for your help!

    • Debbye @ The Baby Sleep Site says

      Hi @Preksha – Thanks for writing back! Your overall schedule is looking good, with a good amount of daytime and nighttime sleep! You may want to continue to stick with what you’re doing, to try and help her learn to fall back to sleep when she wakes at night. The long awake times in the middle of the night can be tough, and often need an expert eye to get to the bottom of those. If things do not smooth out with your gentle coaching, you may want to consider consultations with one of our kind and caring sleep consultants. You can read more about those options here:https://www.babysleepsite.com/services/
      Regarding moving to a controlled crying coaching, you know your baby best. Her abilities to self soothe are key in putting herself to sleep and back to sleep at this age, and your preferences and what you are comfortable with is also key to being able to stick with a plan. Consistency is really important, as you can read more about here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/baby-sleep-training-consistency/
      I hope things smooth out soon! Thank you again for visiting our sleepy little village, and do contact us if you find that you need more help!

  3. Preksha says

    hi
    My baby is 4.5 months old (almost). She’s generally a good baby and hasn’t troubled me transitioning from being rocked to sleeping on the bed without help. She does this comfortably at nap times and at bed time (She usually just sucks on her fingers and goes to sleep in the day). However, when she wakes up at night (which is every 2-3 hours these days), if I try to let her self-soothe, she just wakes up and plays and fusses and plays again and fusses again but doesnt sleep!!

    She was awake for 2 hours in the middle of the night last night and i think got really overtired- eventually after 2.5 hours, I had to carry her and gently rock her back to sleep – even nursing didn’t work.

    how do i get her to go back to sleep at night? When do i stop trying at night? Did i let her try too long?

    • Janelle Reid says

      Hi @Preksha, thank you for your comment! I am sorry you’ve been struggling with your baby’s wake times at night. At this age many babies need between 1-3 feedings at night, but it can be difficult to determine if they are waking to feed versus waking out of habit. It is possible that this sleep regression has been causing the extra wake ups. How has her daytime schedule been? If she is sleeping too much during the day that could also be a factor in the longer wake up times in the middle of the night. Here is a link to a sample schedule for a 4 month old to give you an idea of what the daytime should look like: https://www.babysleepsite.com/schedules/4-month-old-schedule/
      Try to keep those night time interactions as quick, dark and boring as you can to keep her from thinking it’s time to party! I hope that this levels out for you soon but let us know if you need more help! Thanks for using the Baby Sleep Site as a resource for sleep!

  4. Nadia says

    Hi there,

    My wee girl is now 7 months old. She slept through the night (7-8 hours) from 7weeks old with no wakings or dream feeds. When she was 4months old she started waking 2-3 times a night. I thought sleep regression and continued with our normal night time routines as my older son went through this waking at night for only a week. Well 3 months later and we are still up 3-4 times a night with our girl. We put her down awake, she has no problems self settling. She has 2 day time naps at 2 hours each. It’s just that she wakes often at night and wants a feed. We’re normally up for approximately 10-15 minutes and then she wants to go back to bed. She’s eating solids as well as feeding during the day. She is very mobile and started crawling at 6months, I thought the sleep might settle after crawling but she’s still waking. I’m exhausted, my partner works away 5 days a week and no family support near by. With a 3year old boy I don’t get a chance to catch up on sleep.
    Any advise?
    Thanks
    Nadia

    • Neosha says

      @Nadia – Thank you for stopping by our sleepy little village. Isn’t it so interesting how each child can be so different from the other when it comes to these types of things!? It could be that your little girl may need a daytime sleep schedule tweak and, if you’re feeding during each night waking, it may be time to consider weaning her from the feeding. Here are two articles you may find helpful – https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-sleep-needs/baby-how-much-sleep/ will help you with her schedule, if you find it is needed, and https://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/baby-night-wean-3-signs/ will help you determine if it’s time to night wean a couple of those feedings. She may be waking more so out of habit so frequently, than in need of a true feeding 3-4x each night, if you’re feeding each time. If she’s otherwise healthy and getting enough nutrition during the day, we find that most babies her age need 1-2 night feedings, if any.

      I hope these articles help you get a better idea, Nadia. If not, please stop back in and consider one of our personalized sleep consultation packages where one of our veteran sleep consultants will be able to help you troubleshoot and create a plan of action for you and your family to get more sleep. Hang in there!

  5. Marisa says

    My 4.5 month old daughter is going through this now too. We have been trying to get her out of her swaddle for almost two weeks, and it was working at first, but now it’s like she’s a newborn again. I’ve always rocked or nursed her to sleep, but now she wakes up the instant I try to set her in her crib – every time. It’s like she only wants to sleep in my arms. I’m planning to start sleep training soon, so that she will learn to fall asleep on her own. My question is, do I sleep train her in her swaddle, or should we start the training process without it, so she learns both at the same time?

    • Janelle Reid says

      @Marisa, Thank you for writing! I am so sorry you have been struggling with getting your daughter to sleep in her crib and not your arms. It sounds like she has a sleep association to the nursing/rocking so when those things go away, she wakes up again. Here is an article with more information on sleep associations: https://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/sleep-association/
      With the swaddle, it can be a tough transition, so it is up to you if you want to go cold turkey or if you want to take a more gradual approach to transition her. There will be some helpful tips in this article: https://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/weaning-baby-swaddling/
      I hope your sleep training goes well! Let us know if you need any help along the way. 🙂 Thank you for using the Baby Sleep Site as a resource for sleep!

  6. Jess says

    I do not believe my son has any sleep associations, because I lay him down awake without a pacifier, but he is almost 4 mo old (in 2 days) and he wakes up every 2 hours at night still. Not sure if this is regression because for a week or so he was sleeping 4 hours once in a night but now only 2 again. Then early in the morning like 4, 5, 6am he only sleeps 1 hr. He eats every time he wakes up but sometimes not very much. Not sure what to do since I think I am already following the tips? He never has slept more than 4 hours in a row though, I keep thinking it is only a matter of time but for his age shouldn’t he be able to sleep longer?

    • Danielle says

      Hi Jess,
      Thank you so much for your comment and for checking out The Baby Sleep Site! I’m sorry to hear your baby is waking up so much at night! Based on your description, this does sound a lot like the 4 month sleep regression. If this issue has been ongoing for 2 weeks or more, and your baby was born on time and is otherwise healthy, you can check with your pediatrician about whether starting to formally sleep coach might be a good fit for your family. There are many methods you can use to help your baby learn to go back to sleep by himself, when he wakes up at night and doesn’t actually need any help or a feed. You might like our series about different sleep coaching methods that you can use at home here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/sleep-training-from-no-cry-to-cry-series-part-1/
      I hope this helps, and please let us know if you have any other questions. Good luck!

  7. Katie says

    My 3 1/2 month old has started her sleep regression. I have a 20 month old and haven’t gotten into a good routine with the baby. My toddler loves sleep and happily goes to his bed and plays until he falls asleep. He takes a pacifier. My baby just gets so mad. She has eaten a lot before bed since she was born and seems to need to be eating to sleep. She either won’t take one or can’t keep a pacifier in her mouth. I woke her up at 9 am today after sleeping all night. She fought sleep until after noon and slept for several hours and now just fell asleep in her swing at 6:45 pm. I’m going to try to transfer her to bed but how can I get her to nap better tomorrow?? One nap is not enough… I spend most of my day trying to get her to sleep and she gets so mad.

    Also, second question. I read about fixed points in a schedule. My 20 month old goes to bed every night between 7 and 7:30. I haven’t ever woken him up in the morning and the last few months he’s been sleeping in until 8:30 or even 9:30. Then he still takes a 2-2 1/2 hour nap. Should I just make 8:30 his fixed wake up time? He seems to need more sleep and often seems tired around 4 but won’t take a second nap anymore.

    • Debbye @ The Baby Sleep Site says

      Hi @Katie – Thanks for writing to us! 3-4 months can be a tough age for sleep! Have you checked out our sample schedules?:
      https://www.babysleepsite.com/schedules/3-month-old-baby-sleep-and-feeding-schedule/
      Offering naps at the right times can help, as can taking a break if she is not falling asleep, and trying again after a little re-set. YOu definitely do not want to spend all day trying to get her to sleep, but offering them is important! Things may improve as her skills improve and she begins to learn to fall asleep on her own too.
      Here are some things that we have found can help with naps too:
      https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-naps-2/6-baby-toddler-nap-products-must-have/
      And this article should help too!:
      https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-naps-2/baby-wont-nap-7-reasons/
      Regarding your toddler, he looks like he is sleeping more than the average 20 month old, but some children are higher on the sleep needs scale! As you mention, he seems like he needs the sleep! As long as he is developing well, and his Dr is not concerned about the amount of sleep that he gets, or about his development, there may be no need to wake him. If waking him at 8:30 does not seem to affect his nap, mood, or bedtime, do feel free to wake him if that works better for you and your family!

      Fixed points are great, and if needed, do wake him, but it sounds like he may just need more sleep!

  8. Rachel says

    Hello there,

    Sleepy mama here, my wee boy was a great sleeper from day one & was hit by the regression at 5 months about 3 weeks ago now. last week it seemed to be getting better. Going back to sleeping 5/6 hours instead of 1/2. But this only lasted for 3 days now things seem to be getting worse. My husband & I are frightened, we both work part time to be with our boy but we live far out in The Cairngorms in Scotland & have dangerous commutes to work. Accidents are not uncommon you need to be on your game. My mum thinks he just a hungry growing boy and as I breastfeed exclusively I need to offer the breast whenever he wakes up. But now even that isn’t always working. Please help! Xox

    • Debbye @ The Baby Sleep Site says

      Hello @Rachel –
      Sorry to hear that the 4 month sleep regression has been hitting you hard! Please do get some help so that you and your husband can be well rested for work and for your commutes to work! If you have friends or family that can help, or if you can take turns with your husband in getting a better night sleep, it would be good for all of you! This regression is not always outgrown, and it sounds like you may have to be proactive in order to help your son sleep longer in the night! You will want to teach your son to fall asleep on his own, and back to sleep on his own, so that he will begin to fall back to sleep on his own when he wakes so often. He may still need two feeds at night, but at 5 months, he should not need to eat every hour, and waking every hour or two shows that he has a sleep association, especially since feeding him when he wakes does not always work. You may want to read these articles:
      https://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/sleep-association
      https://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/sleep-training-from-no-cry-to-cry-series-part-1
      If you would like more help with this, please consider a personalized consultation package, where we can help you one on one via email. You can visit us here for more info: https://www.babysleepsite.com/services
      Hang in there!!

  9. Sarah says

    I know you said it’s rare for the regression to start at 3 months but I feel like my daughter is going through this and she just turned 3 months. It takes me an hour or more to get her to sleep and then she’ll usually wake up 10-20 mins later! I have to bounce her to sleep even in the middle of the night whereas before she would just eat and fall back to sleep nursing. Does this sound like the regression?

    • Neosha says

      @Sarah – Thank you for stopping by our sleepy little village! It’s not uncommon for a baby to start showing signs of the “4” month sleep regression earlier than that, or around 3 months, no. My daughter’s sleep changed about a week after she turned 3 months, after all, so I’m a living witness. 🙂 What you’re experiencing could be signs that her sleep is starting to change, for sure. If she used to fall right back asleep after feeding and now doesn’t and needs your help in falling asleep and going back to sleep, and this has been going on for more than a day or two, then it’s definitely possible especially if you’ve ruled out other causes. Patience is key in getting through this next few weeks, if so and we advise to just cope as best you can and try to get as much rest for you and your little girl as possible. Soon, you’ll be able to start working on teaching her some new sleep habits and getting her to a place of more independent sleep, if that’s your goal. Here’s a series of articles that you might find helpful as you prepare to start thinking about this more: https://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/boot-camp-part-one-5-things-to-do-before-sleep-training/

      If you find you would like more support during or after this time, we’re here to help however we can. You can read all about what we do here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/help-me-choose/ Hang in there, Sarah, and please stop back in to see us soon.

  10. Jessica says

    Can this regression start at 3 months instead of 4?? My son is almost 15 weeks and was sleeping 8-9 hours and is now up twice!!

    • Danielle says

      Hi Jessica,
      Thank you for your comment at The Baby Sleep Site! In rare cases, yes, the regression can start a couple of weeks early, but it’s not especially common. We don’t recommend sleep training under 4 months for any baby, regardless of regression status 🙂 I would say that most 3 month-olds do wake 1-3 times a night to eat, and that’s considered normal for the age. You can read more in our sample 3 month-old schedule here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/schedules/3-month-old-baby-sleep-and-feeding-schedule/
      We do see some babies who were previously sleeping through the night start to wake more often, as they become more active and just need more calories.
      I hope this helps, but please let us know if you have questions! Good luck!