Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.
Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.
Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.

Reader Interactions


  1. Melissa Allen says

    My 4 month old nurses and goes to bed pretty easily, but I have to hold him til he is really asleep to lay him in his crib. Honestly it doesn’t take too long and he only wakes once at night to nurse and go back to bed. But nap time is difficult. He has to be held the entire time and lately he is even fighting that. But every where I see it says to sleep train at night first. Thoughts? Should I put him to bed awake and sleep train him at night first then go to naps?

    • Janelle Reid says

      Hi @Melissa Allen, thanks for writing! I am sorry you’re struggling with your son’s sleep association to being held for his sleep. I am glad it’s not giving you too much trouble at night but I’m sure you’re ready for some hands free nap times. All parents approach sleep training differently, but yes many do start with bedtime. Since bedtime isn’t horrible for you and you’d rather start with naps, I say give it a try! Nap time and night time sleep come from different parts of the brain, which is why there can be one area of sleep that’s good, and another that isn’t working out. We have a free guide available to download with nap tips that may help you as you move forward:
      I hope that helps!

  2. Saeedeh says

    Hi there. Great article 🙂

    I slept train my baby from 2-3 months ago, first her night sleep and lately her naps. She coped very well and now our routine is like Feeding, reading/bath, rocking to get sleepy and then leaving her to sleep.

    My first question is: Is this rocking section necessary? Shouldn’t we get rid of it at some point?

    Second, Although our normal life became suuuuper easier after sleep training, I don’t get it how is it helpful when we travel when there is such a routine. I mean how is she going to sleep in trains and airplanes? Do we need to rock her or what about when we can’t have bath routine?
    What about when we go on a vacation and we want to stay outside till midnight but baby wants to sleep around 6-7?

    These are very important questions for us that are making us not to go on vacations as we are afraid she’s going to lose her ability to self-sleep.
    After sleep training now I can cook proper food for her and feed her on time and she receives it muuuuch better. I can study when she’s asleep and we play energetically when she’s awake.

    • Danielle says

      Hi Saeedeh,
      Thank you for visiting The Baby Sleep Site – I’m glad the article was helpful! It’s great sleep training has helped your family, but I absolutely hear that it can be tough to keep to the routine every single day. One option might be to start phasing out pieces of the routine that would be hard during travel, like, as you mention, the rocking, or maybe not doing a bath every night. You don’t mention your baby’s age, but many babies can be somewhat flexible with the schedule during vacation, and then you just go right back to your “usual” routine once you get back. We have an article with some tips to help here:
      You might just have to try and see how it goes – your baby might surprise you 🙂 Good luck!

      • Saeedeh says

        Thank you Danielle for your tips. My baby girl is 11 months old 🙂 I omitted the bath and she is fine with it, but I think no rocking is still a little early as it takes her almost 15 minutes to fall asleep if I don’t rock her, however, she doesn’t cry just moving around in her bed till she falls asleep. And thank you for the article you mentioned, I was looking for such an article all over the web.

  3. Amanda says

    Hi! My son will be 4 months old in 6 days and I want to start sleep training. The only thing is that we go on vacation in 5 weeks. Should I start sleep training him now, or wait until we get back? I am afraid if I don’t train him now, he won’t sleep on vacation. I’m also concerned he still might be too young. Help! Thanks.

    • Emily DeJeu says

      @ Amanda – hmmm…good question! 5 weeks is usually plenty of time to see at least some improvement in sleep; additionally, its a long time to wait! It might be good to start working on making schedule changes as necessary (you can see sample schedules here), and to gradually begin weaning away from sleep associations (you can ready more about sleep associations here). Also, if you want some extra guidance and help with sleep coaching, you can consider our Express Sleep Plan; it’s budget-friendly and available instantly, and will give you a comprehensive sleep coaching plan that you can put to work right away!

  4. nikki says

    How do I know if our son needs sleep training? He’s 14 months old and still wakes up 1 time a night (occasionally 2 times but 1 is more common) and wants to nurse. He’ll get a good feeding in and then go right back to sleep. He’s in bed for about 12 hours and takes 2 good naps during the day. We’d LOVE it if he didn’t wake up at night, but having him CIO for hours at a time is miserable for all of us, including our 3 year old. Is waking up at this age normal? Thanks!

    • Emily DeJeu says

      @ nikki – great question! I’d say that if the 1-2 night wakings per night don’t really bother you, and if (as you say) he wakes, eats, and goes right back down, then there really may not be a “problem” to fix here. If you do want to make a change, though, I’d say that the focus for you will be more on night weaning than on sleep training. If your son can already go back to sleep on his own, they you don’t really need to sleep train; you just need to phase out that night feeding via night weaning.

      We have a cool quiz here that will help you determine if it’s time to night wean: We also include some other great night weaning resources there, that you may want to check out. Additionally, if you want better insight into HOW to night wean, you could consider becoming a member (; we have an in-depth article that explains exactly how to use fixed and fluid night weaning schedules to phase out night feedings.

      Hope this helps, Nikki! Thanks for commenting 😉