In this sleep training series, so far I’ve talked about the importance of a bedtime routine and gone over how you can sleep train while co-sleeping. In part 3 of this series, I will be discussing the “fading” method of sleep training.
Fading, The Method
This method I would consider one of the no-cry (or very little cry) methods. As I’m sure I’ve mentioned before, when you change the rules how baby falls asleep (usually by breaking a sleep association), it is usually not done without some form of protest. Your baby is sleepy and wants to be sleeping and you aren’t doing what you’ve always done! He or she might get a little mad here! How would you feel if you had to learn to sleep without your pillow? But, with practice, time and commitment we can all learn a new way to sleep.
With this method, you help your baby fall asleep, but you set up “rules” as to how you will slowly take yourself out of the equation. If you think about how you have done most of the work up until this point, now you will develop rules to follow that will shift the “work” to your baby/child. If you have always rocked baby all the way to sleep, you might rock him/her less time and put him in the crib drowsy, but awake and let him/her try to fall asleep on his/her own. If he/she gets worked up, you try to quiet and soothe them using other methods until he/she is asleep. Each night, you do less and less “work” and your baby should do more of it.
Fading: How Long Will It Take?
As you can see, this method can take a lot of time and patience on your part. And, depending on the temperament of the child, it might be very difficult to follow it through until the end. But, if you do not want to allow your child to cry alone and you also don’t want to continue the path you’re on now, it’s a great first step! After all, how do you know whether it will work or not if you don’t try it? The amount of time this method will take will be directly related to your ability to be CONSISTENT and your child’s temperament and personality (how strong-willed is he/she and will he/she “outlast” you?). It is imperative that you remain consistent because if you falter 1 hour in, for example, then it will only be that much harder next time. I highly recommend writing down the plan you hope to follow such that you can refer to it and really stick to it 100%.
Get Personalized Help With Fading Sleep Associations
Fading out sleep associations with persistent babies can be challenging. Our consultants at The Baby Sleep Site® are experts! When you work with one of our sleep consultants, she will create a Personalized Sleep Plans® for your family that includes detailed guidance on how to sleep train. Even better, once you have your Personalized Sleep Plan®, your consultant will walk you through each step of implementing it at home.
Sleep Resources That WORK
For those persistent nighttime struggles, check out The 3 Step System to Help Your Baby Sleep. Using the same unique approach and practical tools for success, this e-book helps you and your baby sleep through the night.
If you’re looking for ways to get your baby or toddler into a healthy sleeping routine during the day, I encourage you to explore Mastering Naps and Schedules, a comprehensive guide to napping routines, nap transitions, and all the other important “how-tos” of good baby sleep. With over 45 sample sleep schedules and planning worksheets, Mastering Naps and Schedules is a hands-on tool ideal for any parenting style.
Or, join our Members Area packed with exclusive content and resources: e-Books, assessments, detailed case studies, expert advice, peer support, and more. It actually costs less to join than buying products separately! As a member, you’ll also enjoy a weekly chat with an expert sleep consultant.
Continue to Part 4 of this series.
Does the fading method sound like a good method for you? Have you tried fading yet? Share your questions and tips with us!
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For those persistent nighttime struggles, check out The 3 Step System to Help Your Baby Sleep. Using the same unique approach and practical tools for success, this e-book helps you and your baby sleep through the night.
Learn More About The 3-Step System
If you’re looking for ways to get your baby or toddler into a healthy sleeping routine during the day, explore Mastering Naps and Schedules, a comprehensive guide to napping routines, nap transitions, and all the other important “how-tos” of good baby sleep. With over 45 sample sleep schedules and worksheets, Mastering Naps and Schedules is a hands-on tool ideal for any parenting style.
Learn More About Mastering Naps
For those persistent toddler sleep struggles, check out The 5 Step System to Help Your Toddler Sleep. Using the same unique approach and practical tools for success, this e-book helps you and your toddler sleep through the night and enjoy a better daytime schedule.
Learn More About The 5-Step System
Join our VIP Members Area packed with exclusive content and resources: e-Books, assessments, detailed case studies, expert advice, and more. As a VIP member, you'll also enjoy a weekly chat with an expert sleep consultant.
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BelgianQueen says
Shannon,
First of, you are a trooper congrats. I did it only for about three months only b/c my son decided to reject my breast perhaps due to the introduction of formula to combine or I have no clue. In any case I pump and it works too.
Based on what I read on “Healthy sleeping Habits Happy child” they have two options:
1. Attempt a full feeding (I think it means make sure the baby doesn’t fall asleep while feeding and gets its full meal and that both breast are ‘mostly emptied’).
2. Pump and have your husband or someone else feed the baby so you get much deserved rest. Not sure how much she is eating but either ask your Pediatrician how much to give her in the bottle.
I would read up on it from a reliable site or definitely ask your pediatrician.
Good Luck.
No ST ~ What method do you recommend instead of the “maybe-Cry” or CIO for a strong temperament infant like mine based on your experience?
It brakes my heart to hear him cry AT ALL, let alone for hours. My husband wants him to learn to self sooth and sleep once you put him on the crib, or when he wakes up in the middle of the night “sometimes”. Mostly thinking of me b/c he likes me to swing him or rock him to go back to sleep.
How do as an experience nanny train/help them to sleep/nap on their own w/o these methods. Once you rock them to sleep they will always expect the same. Yes, it is my duty as a parent but I tired parent = useless parent/wife/worker etc..
Thanks
BelgianQueen says
Shannon,
First of, you are a trooper congrats. I did it only for about three months only b/c my son decided to reject my breast perhaps due to the introduction of formula to combine or I have no clue. In any case I pump and it works too.
Based on what I read on “Healthy sleeping Habits Happy child” they have two options:
1. Attempt a full feeding (I think it means make sure the baby doesn’t fall asleep while feeding and gets its full meal and that both breast are ‘mostly emptied’).
2. Pump and have your husband or someone else feed the baby so you get much deserved rest. Not sure how much she is eating but either ask your Pediatrician how much to give her in the bottle.
I would read up on it from a reliable site or definitely ask your pediatrician.
Good Luck.
No ST ~ What method do you recommend instead of the “maybe-Cry” or CIO for a strong temperament infant like mine based on your experience?
It brakes my heart to hear him cry AT ALL and my husband wants him to learn to self sooth and sleep once you put him on the crib, or when he wakes up in the middle of the night “sometimes”.
How do as an experience nanny train him to sleep/nap on their own w/o these methods.
No ST says
I am a professional nanny. Babies whose parents have paid the big bucks to sleep consultants and “tried” (unsucsessfully) sleep training have by far the most anxiety ridden, unhappy, freaked out babies. It breaks my heart to follow the directions of sleep training and it goes against my natural instincts which have been quite successful for 35 years of childcare. This “quick fix cure” seems to create neurotic babies/ parents. I think its a racket.
Shannon Aguayo says
My baby has always insisted on being nursed to sleep, but she’s now 11 months old! I think we’re both overdue for some good sleep. She still wakes up several times a night to nurse. How do I go about breaking this sleep association? And get her to sleep in her crib. Putting her on a bedtime routine is helping but I have no idea how to put her to bed without nursing her.