A baby night waking is one of the most common issues that bring tired parents to The Baby Sleep Site. But, why exactly do babies wake at night? Why won’t your baby sleep? This article will discuss the 5 primary reasons for baby night waking.
1. Sleep Prop
The official name is “sleep association” but these are more widely known as “sleep props” or “crutches.” This is something your baby “needs” (using that term loosely) in order to sleep. For most babies, in my experience, this will be a pacifier, bottle, or breastfeeding (so a nipple of some sort because sucking is so soothing to them). For many others, this might be movement such as rocking, bouncing, walking, the car, etc. Still fewer, some babies will wake for much less. It might be a hand on their back, just a little reassurance, picking them up for a minute, a snuggle with mom. For high-needs babies, they may need more than one (e.g. bouncing with a pacifier). This varies based on your baby’s temperament.
The bigger the sleep prop, the easier to change, for most babies. Some babies’ sucking reflex is much stronger, though, that can be difficult to change depending on your baby’s age. Sometimes you need to avert their sucking to something besides a pacifier that is harder to find at night, for example. By far, I believe the “small” reasons for waking are much harder to change. Who wants to deny your baby a one-minute hug if he seems to need it, even though it’s exhausting to be woken up EVERY night at 4 a.m.? It becomes an issue of attempting to teach them that there is a right and wrong time for certain things such as 2 p.m. IS an appropriate time to play peek-a-boo, but 2 a.m.? Not so much. It is probably your fault your baby won’t sleep and that’s okay!
2. Developmental Milestones
When your baby is learning how to roll, crawl, pull up, cruise, walk, talk, etc. this can disrupt their night sleep (and your baby’s naps, too!). This might not be too surprising to you since you know all too well when you have a lot on your mind, you might have trouble sleeping, too. This is particularly true during the 8, 9, or 10 month old sleep regression.
One key here is to keep your expectations in check because even when it doesn’t seem like your baby is learning something new doesn’t mean he isn’t. There is a lot to learn and you will be amazed at just how much they change in a short amount of time. When your baby can learn how to go back to sleep on his own, this night waking can be a lot less disruptive for everyone. It doesn’t mean it will necessarily be perfect, but you hearing him wake once a night is a lot different than five times! Even better when he can go back to sleep on his own without a tear or your input whatsoever. Just because a baby wakes at night doesn’t mean he needs to “need” something.
3. Teething
Gah! Teething. It feels like babies teethe for what feels like a constant two years! Many people will throw in that they can teethe for a long time before a tooth even pops through, too. This makes you feel powerless because you have to constantly wonder if teeth are trying to pop through or not. Is he in pain? Is this why my baby is waking all night? Then there is the “other” side who say teething does not disrupt sleep at all. Yeah…right. Because all babies are the same, right? I can tell you there are plenty of babies who are great sleepers but wake for a week (or so) due to teething and then go back to sleeping well, so I know teething does affect some babies.
Having a “teething plan” is of utmost importance. I tried to be sensitive to my sons during teething, but also had to keep sleep at the top of priorities for everyone’s sakes. My second son had a much rougher time with teething than his older brother (who inspired this site) who had more sleep problems, ironically! Finding a healthy balance of helping them through teething without creating a bunch of sleep props is the key to getting through the two years (or more) of teething. I think part of what got me through was what toddlers can teach you about sleep training.
4.Hunger
This one might seem obvious, but there are some people who are surprised when a 5-month-old breastfed baby is still waking at night for a feeding or two, especially if their doctor has told them their baby should not need to eat at night. Keep in mind that to go all night without eating means going 12-13 hours without a feeding, since babies need a lot of sleep. Make sure you read about night feedings and when to night wean.
5. Being Human
This one seems to surprise people. A lot of new parents seem to be confused as to why their baby does not sleep the same every day. This is just a friendly reminder that our babies are not robots. I, too, wondered why my baby woke up at a different time every day or a different time at night for his feeding or took a different length nap every day. Not only did I wonder, but it drove me crazy!! I look back and wondered why I expected him to be the same every day. Perhaps it was the books I was reading. I honestly don’t know.
There are some babies who you can set a clock by and then there are those like my son who’s different every. single. day. Without fail! Most of it is his temperament and the fact that not all babies are regular. I look at myself and realize that I am not 100% consistent every day, either. Sometimes I’m starving when I wake up and other days I’m not. Some days I’m starving for lunch by 11 a.m. and other days I wait until 1 p.m. to eat. Why did I expect my baby to be the same every day when I’m not? I’ll never figure that one out, but I can share my wisdom with you that our babies will have good days and bad days just like we do.
There are many reasons a baby is waking at night (or any person for that matter) and the number of reasons increases with toddler sleep. Too cold, too warm, sick, and so on. The above reasons are just the five that seem to come up most frequently in sleep consultations. You may want to read about the ideal temperature for your baby to sleep and, of course, when your baby is miserable due to illness, make sure that you comfort and tend to them so they can get better. As with any temporary sleep disruption, though, try to limit things that can become long-term habits.
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sleepy Starz Sleep Training says
My daughter is 5 and a half months and for the last two weeks have been waking up almost every hour or half hour all night . She’s never been a good sleeper and I’ve tried everything.She sleeps at my mother in laws a few days a week and she only wakes up once.
Danielle says
Hi Alex,
Thanks for visiting The Baby Sleep Site! Based only on her age, you might be experiencing a late 4 month regression. We have an article on that here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-sleep-patterns/4-month-sleep-regression/
Or, sometimes when a baby has different caregivers, there’s a difference in the caregiver response, the baby’s schedule, or in the environment that can affect sleep. It may be worth talking to your mother-in-law about what she’s doing and see if it’s something different. Hope this helps – good luck!
Catherine says
Hello ladies!
Our 9 month old breast fed daughter who has slept in the bed with mummy and daddy since birth, began sleeping through for 11-12 hours every night from 3 months until 5 months and during this time she slept in the cot next to our bed. We then started baby led weaning but she still was waking at night for feeds.
We are now visiting family for 2 months in Australia and as much as we are trying to keep her in a routine she is waking sometimes 6 times throughout the night to feed just to go back to sleep. Everything else doesn’t work eg. rocking/my finger.
Any suggestions would be greatly welcomed!
Janelle Reid says
Hi @Catherine, thanks for your comment. I’m sorry that you are struggling on your daughter’s sleep during your visit with family. We have a free guide with tips to help your child sleep through the night that you can sign up to receive here if you are interested: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-sleep-through-night-free-ebook/
If you are still having issues when you get home and need help, our sleep consultant team would be happy to help you through this transition and getting her sleeping on her own through the night like she was previously. You can view our options to work with a consultant here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/
I hope this helps!
Daisy Parker says
My five month old is constantly waking up through the night she goes down great between 6/7 then can be up any time from ten for a bottle back up at two and then anything from 4 o’clock in the morning then she’s up for he day at 6 she just can’t seem to self soothe through the night and needs me to help her. I’m absolutely exhausted she’s not the best napper through the day there like half hour power naps and occasionally she will sleep a few hours I thought by now she would get better anyone got any help points
Janelle Reid says
@Daisy Parker, Hang in there! This can be a challenging age, for sure. I have been there myself. Keep in mind at this age 1-2 feedings is still normal, but we do have a free guide available which can give you some more tips for helping determine if she is waking up out of habit or because she actually needs a feeding. You can sign up to receive the guide here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-sleep-through-night-free-ebook/
If you need more specific advise to your situation, let us know! We have a team of sleep consultants that would love to help. To read more about that you can visit our services page here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/
I hope this helps and things begin to improve for you soon!
Candice says
Daisy, Just wanted to say my 6.5 month old son has the exact same schedule as yours. I am looking for answers too as I al exhausted and looking for a change. We have tried many things. Just know you are not alone… I know its not much consolation.
Kiara says
Very interesting post! I wonder how to deal with occasional night waking (once a week or less) with a baby who is otherwise sleeping well and self settles both at bedtime and naps without fussing (provided it is right within his sleep window as he’s very, very sensitive to overtiredness). He is 7.5 months old and sleeps 11 to 11.5 h at night (with a dream feed before I go to bed) and 3 hours during the day (over 3 naps, his awake time is still too short to try 2 naps). I usually know the possible cause of the waking (e.g. a less than perfect nap day; my older daughter screaming as she had a nightmare…). I hear my baby talking to himself for a bit, then going quiet for a bit, then mantra cry…when this escalates I go to him but by this point it’s around 45 minutes since he’s first woken up, he’s overtired and nothing calms him, only a breastfeed -he then self settles and falls asleep in his cot, not at the breast. However, I don’t think he wakes up because he’s hungry in the first place (based on his typical feed/sleep patterns)…could it be that he gets hungry while he’s staying awake? My feeling though is that he cries because he’s overtired and nothing else settles him as time passes and he becomes more and more tired. I don’t want him to become dependent on this feed in case it starts disrupting his sleep longer term, but at the same time it feels cruel to continue patting or PU-PD if it’s not working (in fact he cries more and prolongs his tiredness) given he is brilliant at self settling when he’s not overtired. What am I doing wrong? Should I go into his room a bit sooner to try and settle him (during his mantra cry before he becomes upset)? Just to add that we are not in favour of CIO and did sleep training with him using a gentle no cry approach.
Thanks in advance for any comments.
Janelle Reid says
Hi @Kiara, thank you for writing to us! I am sorry your almost 8 month old has been experiencing the occasional/weekly night waking. As I am a representative of our Client Relations department and not a sleep consultant, it is difficult for me to say what the cause is or what the best way to handle the situation would be. Our sleep consultants would be happy to look at a full sleep history of your son and offer advise to you on how to handle these wake-ups. They are happy to work with you on gentle/low cry methods as well, as we are all parent’s ourselves and know limited crying is every parent’s desire. If you are interested you can contact us directly here so we can point you in the right direction of a package that may best suit your needs: https://www.babysleepsite.com/contact
Hang in there! Thank you for using the Baby Sleep Site as a resource for sleep!
Keri says
Hi,
My 10 month old has had A sleep routine since 10 months. She goes to sleep on her own. But, whenever she wakes at night it takes her an hour to an hr and half to fall back asleep. Whether it’s at midnight or 4am, whenever it is…it takes her that long. We don’t rush in and most times don’t go in bc she’s whining and not full out crying, but tgis seems like a long time to be trying to go to sleep. Now I know theirs a 8/9/10 month sleep regression, but tgis has been going on since we sleep trained at 6 1/2 months. She isn’t working on a skill, she is legitamitely trying to go back to sleep for an hr and half as I write tgis at 12:30 at night. She gets between 2-2 1/2 hrs of day time sleep. We put her to bed at 7pm and she gets up at 6, but that’s with the hr to be 1/2 night waking almost nightly. I’m at a loss. I just feel bad bc tgis has been going on for over 3 months. What can I do to help her.
Nicole Johnson says
@Kari I’m sorry to hear your 10 month old is having some “baby insomnia” and I know how concerning that can be. Unfortunately, there aren’t any quick answers to resolving that problem. Long night-waking typically takes a sleep consultant taking a look at your entire sleep history as well as analyzing a sleep log over a period of 1-2 weeks, which we are unable to do on the blog here. Most of the time, insomnia is a schedule problem, but not always. If you’d like to consider talking one-on-one with a sleep consultant live chat in our Members Area or a services package would be something to consider. Since it’s been happening for a couple months already, it doesn’t sound like the regression. If you’re interested, please check out our DIY page here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/diy/ or our Services page here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/services . Hang in there and good luck!
Sue says
Our son is 6.5 months, is learning how to roll over, sit up and wants to crawl. I believe he is teething as well. He frequently ( every 1 – 1.5 ) wakes up and I’m worried he’s not getting enough sleep during night. His naps are cat naps (30 min) ever since he was little. I try not to pick him up or give him too many sleep props. I’m out of ideas how to settle him to sleep. He used to a great sleeper ?
Nicole Johnson says
@Sue Welcome to our sleepy little village! I’m sorry to hear your 6 1/2 month old is waking so frequently every 1 to 1 1/2 hours at night. 🙁 You’re not alone and I’m sure you’re exhausted! Have you downloaded our free e-Book, 5 Ways to Help Your Child Sleep Through the Night? In it, you will learn more about why your baby is likely waking at night. Here is the link: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-sleep-through-night-free-ebook/ . If that hasn’t helped, we would need to review a full sleep history in order to help you diagnose why he may be waking so frequently. Hang in there!
Kayla says
My 10 month old has been waking up at 4 am for the past week.shes always slept from 9 to 7am since we brought her home.i cant tell if shes teething or if it cause shes learing to be so mobile an active.last week she had two teeth pop up and iv also been only breastfeeding 4 times a day and shes a big comfert feeder.when she wakes the only way to make her quiet and go back to sleep is brestfeeding but i dont wanna start a bad habbit.
Nicole Johnson says
@Kayla I’m sorry to hear your 10 month old has been waking up at 4am every day. Early waking is a common problem and usually related to a schedule problem. Without knowing more details, it’s hard to diagnose what might be happening, but we certainly don’t want to make new, potentially long-term habits if she used to sleep all night without feeding. You might be interested in our early-waking resources. Here is the e-Book we have about early waking, if you’re interested in becoming a member: https://members.babysleepsite.com/shift-your-childs-schedule/
Hang in there and good luck!
Scharlet says
my first comment says my son is 21 months old, and im not sure how to change it but i meant to put that he is 11 months
Scharlet says
my son is 21 months old and will be turning one next month, he was sleeping pretty good at night may wake up for a bottle but slept well, now all of a sudden he doesn’t seem to sleep well. he rolls around all night trying to get comfortable and cries alot even when dry and has a bottle. he was sleeping in his own bed at night but has been sleeping with me because its so tying having to get up and down out of bed as im 6 months pregnant, i have tried putting him back in his own bed once i get him back to sleep but he wakes up crying from rolling around. what can i do to may be help him sleep again?
Janelle Reid says
@Scharlet, Thank you for your comment and congratulations on your pregnancy as well! I am sorry you have been struggling with your 11 month old’s sleep. That definitely is extra challenging when you are pregnant. I don’t know when this started, but it is possible your son is going through a sleep regression. There is one that hits usually somewhere between 8-10 months, so hopefully this is just hitting your son a little later (or maybe it’s been going on for a while) and his sleep will smooth out soon. Here is a link to more information about the regression: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-sleep-patterns/8-9-10-month-old-baby-sleep-regression/ There is also another one that hits around 11-12 months old, but usually affects naps. Here is an article o n that one: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-naps-2/12-month-olds-one-nap-transition/
The key with any hiccup in sleep (be it regression, teething, illness, etc) is to remain as consistent as you can – of course with illness or when they are in pain for teething it’s likely everything isn’t exactly the same – as to avoid starting any bad habits. Here is more info on this: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-sleep-patterns/baby-sleep-regression-phase-habit/
Lastly, here is a sample schedule for an 11 month old just to make sure he is getting all the sleep he needs during the day. Often babies wake more at night if they are overtired during the day, so it may be that you’ll want to give his naps a little more attention if they have been suffering as well: https://www.babysleepsite.com/schedules/11-month-old-schedule/
Hang in there! I hope this levels out soon!
Lauren T says
My 5.5 month old daughter recently has started waking up shortly after I lay her down and multiple times through out the night. She previously had been sleeping through the night. On average she takes 3 naps a day.
We then try to make sure to put her pajamas on her around 7pm, attend to her, give her a small woobie, pacifier, and lay her down when she is yawning and almost asleep which is usually around 8:30pm. Now, she is waking up at 9:30, 12amish, and again at 5 am the past week. We don’t grab her right away as typically she is just rolling about and talking, but the moment she cries I attend to her.The issue aside from the change is that every time she wakes up it is an hour long struggle from which she needs me to snuggle up against her, rock her, sometime nurse her, or even put her in our bed to go back to sleep.
Is this sleep regression? Or have I become the sleep association object?
I’m tired and could use any advice mommas.
Danielle says
Hi Lauren,
Thanks for using The Baby Sleep Site as a resource! I’m so sorry to hear about the sudden night waking your daughter’s experiencing. It’s possible that your daughter’s bumping into the 4 month sleep regression a little late, but based on your description, it sounds more likely that she is using you as a sleep association. You can try giving her a minute or two after she wakens to help her learn to fall back asleep on her own, or using a gentle sleep coaching method like the chair method might be a good fit for your family: https://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/5-baby-sleep-training-methods-explained/
I hope this helps, but please let us know if you have any other questions. Good luck!