A friend of mine just had a baby and she gave me the idea for this article. Her family was urging her to “get the baby used to sleeping with noise.” If I had a dime every time someone told me part of my son’s sleep problems were because he needed to get used to sleeping with noise… Well, I’d probably only have $5, but still, it was really frustrating to hear! Here’s what I’ve learned in my years of experience helping families with their sleep…
YOU CAN’T GET A BABY TO GET USED TO NOISE AND SLEEP THROUGH IT.
Okay, you might be able to help them not wake up with every little noise, but overall, your baby has a certain hard-wired threshold where certain things will wake him up. Period.
When your baby is a newborn, he will spend most of his time in a deep sleep and may even sleep through almost ANYTHING! In deep sleep, it takes a lot to wake us up (adults included). Around 6 weeks old, he will become more social and start returning your smiles. This might be around the time that noises start becoming interesting. He may not be able to sleep through as much, but usually, he will still be in a deep sleep a lot of the time. By 4 months old, the way he sleeps changes a lot regarding when he goes into a deep sleep and he may be even more affected by noise.
Babies will vary as to how many noises interest them or wake them up and how quickly they can fall back to sleep if they do hear a noise.
Both my boys could not sleep through much noise at all and were not portable babies. (I could not count on them falling asleep on the go). But, my second son could fall back to sleep MUCH easier than my first. You might think I didn’t make enough noise with them, but let me assure you, I did! My first son was in a very noisy daycare for 8+ months. (This was before we got a nanny and kept him home, partially due to his sleep issues). He NEVER “got used” to noise! He simply has always been worried he will miss something fun if he has to sleep! And he all but went on a nap strike at daycare many times.
Even as a 3-year-old, at bedtime, he would claim he was not tired, say he didn’t want to go to sleep, and then fall asleep 4 minutes later. (I am not exaggerating!) He was no different as a baby and would fight sleep tooth and nail. 🙂
With both of my boys, we made sure we put the barking dogs away and gave them a quiet place to sleep. The nursery was calm and quiet. We later bought White Noise Machines, to block out some of the household noises and encourage longer naps and better night sleep. Another friend’s baby was able to sleep through a lot more noise and on-the-go compared to my boys. It’s often just luck of the draw!
So, the next time someone tells you to get baby used to sleeping with noise, don’t walk on your tiptoes! But please do try some white noise, and give your baby a quiet place to sleep if he needs it. I can tell you one thing, I certainly can’t sleep with dogs barking outside my door or the radio blaring. I don’t expect my babies to, either.
Do you think a baby can learn to sleep through noise?
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Victoria Roe says
Thank the Lord for this advice! All my 3 kids have been light sleepers and just like Nicole Johnson I tend not to even enter my 6 month old son’s room before going to bed for fear of waking him with a creaky floorboard etc!!However, I do have a relaxing cd on repeat for the whole time he sleeps just to drown out any sudden background noises of people outside or dogs barking etc.So take note in-laws and parents that it is not just me being paranoid – my kids are light sleepers just like me and as Nicole says I can’t sleep through dogs barking etc so neither should my kids!!
Bri says
Wow. This article and the comments were enlightening. I have a 9 month old and her sound machine just stopped working. It is a big decision for us whether we want to try to let her sleep without it. She seems to be a light sleeper in that some mild noises wake her even with the sound machine. However, the first night with no machine has gone well. Decisions, decisions.
By the way, I love the person who wrote in about what they will do when they have kids. Why would they even be reading this??! Funny.
Suzan says
Thank uuuuu! Reading this made me reliefed and assured me am on the right track. I heard that comment million times. It made me think i do sth wrong in the way i deal with my baby’s sleep habits. I thought if i couldnt sleepwith the doors slapping or people talking loudly then my baby would not too. When i tried to put him in such environment all i got was an over tiered baby. White noise and a quite room is just perfect for him.
Debbye says
Hi Jess-
Thank you for sharing! That is So true! 🙂
JessDK says
@E,
Parenting is a great lesson in selfless-ness. You don’t have to have children if you don’t want to. Because they will change your life forever! And for the better. I used to believe that kids should not affect my adult fun. BUT, then I grew up. And my son came along. And he’s changed EVERYTHING! And I’m glad to have him in my life. Sometimes it’s hard to give up some things I’ve come to enjoy, but having my son healthy and happy is so worth the small sacrifices. I love him. As a parent, you love your kids….
Debbye says
@ Perawatan- Thank you for your kind words! We hope you keep reading!
@ Brooke- Dr. Sears is a great resource for families. Thanks for sharing!
Brooke says
@E-
Geez E, I’d hate to be your child. Maybe you should read up some info by one of the best pediatricians out there, Dr. Sears.
perawatan bayi says
Wow, what a blog! I mean, you just have so much guts to go ahead and tell it like it is. Youre what blogging needs, an open minded superhero who isnt afraid to tell it like it is. This is definitely something people need to be up on. Good luck in the future, man
E says
This will be a fairly big issue with me when I do have kids cause I don’t want to have to be this (you got to be quit) for the baby to sleep parent. Walk on eggshells always be super quiet for the baby. Screw that, they need to learn to sleep in noise and especially if were out and about it’s not on the damn babies time.
I refuse to let the baby dictate my life schedule when were out and about. If were at some party, a friends house etc it’s when us parents are ready to go not when the kids are (tired). The kids/babies aren’t going to ruin the parents life. If kids are tired (just like when I was a kid) you went to sleep on that persons couch or maybe the bed where the guests coats are. To many parents these days freak out way too much about oh the babies tired we need to RUSH home just to put them down. Way too many parents are like RUSH RUSH home just to put the baby down. SCREW that!! It’s ok to let your babies cry if it’s just like a tired cry cause they will cry and eventually become so tired they will just fall asleep blah blah blah.
Nicole says
@E Haha! I knew exactly how I’d raise my kids before I had them, too, but it goes really differently than you think. 🙂 If you’re out and about and your baby is cranky, it’s not much fun anyway, so they may dictate your schedule more than you think. But, if your baby doesn’t get cranky, then maybe they won’t! You just won’t know until you get to know your baby and what works for you, the baby, and your family. It’s a lot different having an 8 year old sleep on a couch than an 18-month old, too. The age of the child makes a huge difference. Good luck!!
Joy says
A couple additional notes: He does not do well with people talking. This he finds too distracting. And of course new noises make him startle though be can get back to sleep on his own. He has had loads of practice!