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Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.
Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.
Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.

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Comments

  1. Zamina says

    This article is so timely. I’m a confused mamma and my little girl is 10 months – I have been wracking my brain on how to night wean her. She was ‘sleep trained’ at 6 months and used to sleep through about 9 or 10 hrs, have her feed at 4 or 5am and then finish the rest of her night sleep. Since the 9/10 month regression, I think we have gone back to a sleep association. And now, getting her weaned from nursing to sleep is so much more difficult as she just wants to play if we follow the drowsy but awake method, which by the way used to work. In fact we didn’t even need to nurse at all!

    Interesting that you mention the biting of the shoulder indicates weaning too fast, as she has been doing that quite a bit. I’ll keep in mind to slow down, not that I want to stop feeding, I just want her to sleep through again and stop nursing to sleep… I often wondered if weaning would help her sleep better but obviously not.

  2. Emily DeJeu says

    @ Vanessa — if you’re wanting to get your daughter sleeping later in the day, we actually sell an e-book package that addresses that specific issue: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-waking-too-early/
    Also, I’d say that if your daughter seems happy when she wakes up early, and is babbling and talking to herself instead of crying for you, you’re probably fine to leave her in there. Both of my boys (who are 4 1/4 and 3 at the moment) learned to amuse themselves in their cribs after waking up in the morning and after their naps. It’s nice, because it gives you a bit of a break and keeps you from feeling like you have to rush in the first time they make noise 🙂

  3. Vanessa says

    Hi

    I was actually trying to get some idea as to what I am ment to do when she wants to wake up for the morning and be up at 5am when (I would preferr to go back to bed). As I feel that there are some nights that she will generally sleep right through to 6am and there are the nights that she can’t make it through to 6am (as I find 6am a better time to get up). I also wonder if I really need to get up if she is just talking and chatting to herself (is this just a wake up time or a feeding time) as sometimes she will keep going until you go in there and feed her yet that may not always work as she will continue to be wide awake and want to get up (she is not your average baby who likes to drink a full bottle of milk of 210mls all the time) hence for the 180mls-210mls, she can usually only make it through one-two of those a day and if you give it to her before bed of a night she will be wide awake then, (this is why I have cut it back to 150mls of a night). This is helping but like I said there are still some mornings thats she wakes at 4-5am as she is more a morning feeder than a night feeder at the moment (she has grown out of late night feeding). I guess I just want to know weather these are signs that she doesnt need it or if I should just play it by ear until she is fully ready to sleep right through!

  4. Emily DeJeu says

    @ Lori — check out the Don’t Offer, Don’t Refuse method mentioned in the article. You can read more about it at kellymom.com; they go into more detail than I was able to in the article. Good luck!

    @ Victoria — I would say your situation isn’t abnormal at all, given that your son’s still so young. But it’s easy to compare, isn’t it? I have 3 kids, and I still find myself comparing what my baby girl is doing to what my two boys did when they were her age. Like you said, moving him to his own room might help, if he’s still in the room with you. I always found that I slept better when my kids were out of my room, since I tend to wake up at the slightest sound. Every little sigh made me sit bolt upright in bed 🙂

    @ Cristina — thanks for your advice! Very specific, which is nice; it’ll likely be really helpful to moms who are struggling.

    @ Bev — glad you found a formula that worked (and an inexpensive one!), but that night waking sounds hard. Is it possible he’s going through the sleep regression that happens at 8, 9, or 10 months? (https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-sleep-patterns/8-9-10-month-old-baby-sleep-regression/)

  5. bev says

    Hi there!
    I am having a rough time with my 10 month old. He has been very stubborn when it comes to the bottle, but finally started taking the wide nipple Playtex bottles. The only formula he likes is the President’s Choice kind & it’s way cheaper than the brand name kind (which is kind of a bonus!) But….I’m having a horrible time getting him to go to sleep ( I have always nursed him prior to putting him down for a nap) It’s a minimum 60 min battle. I have let him scream and cry & I don’t know what else to do :(. Also, at night, he goes to bed around 730 & wakes up crying around 2 or 3 for at least an hour. We have let him CIO several times over the past few months, which works great after one horrible night, but then, a couple nights later, he’s back at it. Any suggestions?? I am SO SO exhausted!!!

  6. Cristina Rodriguez says

    Hi Ladies! I will share my experience. My 11 month old is still nursing, but we started the process of weaning about 20 days ago. First, for 10 months he wouldn’t drink milk (mine or formula) from a bottle or cup. He will drink water with no problems, but as soon as it was milk forget it! Finally I made two important changes: I got a Tommie Tippee bottle. The nipple is great, very soft and flexible kind of resembling the human nipple. I started giving him water in this bottle so he can be familiar with it. Then I tried formula and of course he didn’t like it. I finally found a formula called Babys Only http://www.naturesone.com/soy/, sold at whole foods (cheaper than any other regular formula and besides it is organic) and I will mix it with a little bit of non alcohol vanilla, and he drank about 1/2 oz. That was an improvement. So I started increasing the amount and then nurse after he drank about 2 oz. Right now he nurses in the morning, drinks 5oz of formula and 5 minutes of nursing before morning nap, 6oz of formula and 5 minutes of nursing before afternoon nap, 4oz of formula and 10 minutes of nursing before bedtime. I’m planning to increase the formula and reduce the nursing time slowly until completely eliminate nursing. With this changes my milk supply is very low already and he kind of understand this. It will be about one or two more months before I wean him completely, but it is a work in progress. He is also sleeping much better at night thanks God!

  7. Victoria Roe says

    My 4 and half month old son is still waking between 2-3 times a night for nursing, which I am finding exhausting as haven’t had 1 single full nights sleep since he was born. However, looking at this it doesn’t seem so abnormal now. My other 2 kids only woke once a night at this stage and I do seem to compare too much. I just don’t get why he still wakes this often for a feed, as he is a big baby (16lb) and recently started on solids. It is as if he is nursing for comfort in the night. Am wondering also whether a combination of a little CIO and moving him to his own room may help, as I do think I also offer him the breast too easily when he does wake in the night,rather than have him fuss and cry.

  8. Lori says

    I would love to know more about the weaning windows! My son is 18.5 months, and we are needing to have him weaned by 24 months. I would love to BF longer, but it just isn’t practical for many reasons. If anyone knows the gentlest, easiest way, please share. He nurses first thing in the morning, at bedtime, and the rest of the day varies. Since he isn’t the greatest sleeper, he tends to want to nurse all day on days he doesn’t get enough sleep. If he’s well rested, he doesn’t nurse as much.

  9. Emily DeJeu says

    @ Erin — Totally understandable! Breaking sleep associations can be so hard, and it’s heartbreaking to listen to a little one cry. You may be right, though, that weaning him from the breast to a cup of milk would break the association. You could always try the technique mentioned in the article — to offer a shortened nursing session first, and then, while he’s still a little thirsty, offer him a cup of milk.
    Also, you might want to check out Nicole’s article on sleep associations: https://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-training/sleep-association/ That might give you a few new insights into how to deal with your son’s naptime nursing association.

  10. Erin says

    My 14 month old has been sleeping through the night for many months. He eats a lot of solid foods (joins us for all our meals), and he’s still nursing 4 times a day. He can go to sleep at bedtime without needing to nurse to sleep, but he won’t nap without nursing (unless he’s in a moving car). I was thinking about trying to wean, but he is not interested in milk at all. He does drink water from a cup. I’m not in any rush, but I wonder if weaning might help his napping. (I’m also wondering if he would be more open to cow’s milk after weaning.) I have no idea how to get him to nap without nursing. For bedtime, we did a gentle cry it out. That, plus moving him to his own room, ended the nighttime wakings. I’m reluctant to try CIO for naps, and it hasn’t worked before and just feels like a miserable day to me. I’m unsure how to break his association of napping with nursing.