Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.
Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.
Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.

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Reader Interactions


  1. Courtney says

    Hi, we are currently sleep training my 6.5 month old who was previously cosleeping with us. He was nursing 3-6 times a night, mostly for comfort. Now that we are sleep training, how do I slowly cut back his feeds without having him think the 1-2 times I’m picking him up to feed is comforting him and throwing off our sleep plan?

    • Janelle Reid says

      Hi Courtney, thanks for writing to us. It can be tricky to wean from lots of comfort feeding, but he will eventually get it. We often talk about “fixed points” in our articles, and I would suggest having the times you feed him as fixed points to make sure you don’t cave under pressure and go backwards in your progress. It may confuse him at first, but with consistency he will adapt and figure it out with time. Here is a link to a free guide with tips to help your child sleep better at night:
      I hope this helps but if you find you need more specific information, please let us know! We have a ton of resources that can help. Feel free also to email us directly anytime at [email protected]
      Hang in there!

  2. Ali says

    We have started sleep training with our 9month old. She falls asleep at night within a minute of being placed in the crib. Before sleep training she was a deep sleeper now it seems every sound wakes her. Is playing music while she sleeps ok?

    The other issue we are facing is she was sleeping through the night but now is waking up 2 or 3 times and not putting herself back to sleep. What is the best way to night wean? I don’t believe she is actually hungry but I cave to stop the crying as we are room sharing until renovations are complete.

    • Janelle Reid says

      Hi @Ali, thanks for writing to us. I’m glad to hear your daughter has taken to sleep training so well, but I know how nerve wracking it can be to tip toe around the house for the rest of the night (especially since it sounds like you’ve got house projects you’re working on that may be loud!). I personally use white noise with my kids (and myself, ha!) but if music works for you, there’s nothing wrong with that if it’s going well.
      At this age there is a 9 month regression some hit, so that could be the cause of the multiple night issues, and some babies do need that extra feeding – but at 9 months only 1 – just to hold them over until they are closer to 12 months. Here is a link to a free guide that will help give some extra tips on how to get her sleeping through the night again:
      If you need more help, let us know!

  3. Stephanie says

    If you do sleep training before night weaning, is the thought that you feed them (baby takes bottle once a night) with a bottle but put them right back down after feeding and burping and let them cry etc but also then so the 3 mins.. 5 mins… Waiting period etc?

    Same with diaper changes, I assume you can do a nighttime diaper change but then put them back down awake?

    • Debbye @ The Baby Sleep Site says

      Hi @Stephanie, Thanks for writing to us! Yes! The goal would be to still feed and change diapers as needed, but to put the baby back to bed before they are asleep, so that they can learn to fall asleep on their own. Then you would proceed with the sleep coaching from there, whether that mean a waiting period or you soothing from crib-side, or however you choose to sleep coach.
      Good luck Stephanie! We hope it goes smoothly!!

  4. Felicia says

    Hi! My son is 7.5 months and we attempted to night wean while bedsharing but it wasn’t working. We tried many things and ended up sleep training in the pack n play. He wakes only at 2 am now for a feed! Last night he woke for the feed but then cried for 2 hours after! He just wouldn’t settle with or without comfort. It was day 3 of sleep training in his own space. Is this just normal? I was told this means ‘he doesn’t really need the feed’ is this true or is it just a part of him getting used to the new setup? I would really rather keep the feed for my supply…

    • Debbye @ The Baby Sleep Site says

      Hi @Felicia –
      Thanks for writing to us! It sounds like you have made some good progress with your little guy’s sleep and his night weaning! Great work! Waking for one feed is appropriate for his age! Hopefully the long period of crying was just a “one time thing” and he does much better tonight, and each night from here on out. Two hours is a long cry, so I understand your concern! If things do not smooth out, and you want to have a sleep consultant take an in depth look at his sleep history and help you with this, we would love to help!
      You can read about all of our sleep consultation packages here:
      Good luck Felicia!!

  5. Galit Cohen says

    Hello Janelle,
    My son is almost 14 months old and he still wakes up on a good night 3-4 times. The only way he will go back down is if I nurse him. He won’t take a pacifier and doesn’t want my cuddles or anyone else’s. He just wants to nurse. We are still rooming in with him and will for the next 2.5 months due to a houseguest being in our house

    • Janelle Reid says

      Hi @Galit Cohen, thanks for sending that information along, and I am so sorry to hear your son is waking up for you so many times at night. It sounds like you could use a little more specific advise to help with this, and I would highly recommend working with one of our expert sleep consultants so they can give you specific information for your situation. You can view our different packages here:
      Hang in there! We hope to be able to work with you!

  6. Valerie says

    My son is almost 10 months old. He goes to sleep on his own for naps and bedtime without a fuss but is still waking 4 times a night almost like clockwork. Bedtime routine starts at 630 and he is asleep by 7. He wakes at 930, 12, 230 and 4-430 every single night. We have tried not feeding and rocking, soothing, sending in the husband…to no avail. I thought when we sleep trained at bedtime that the night wakings would decrease but they haven’t. Do we need to implement the same sleep training that we used at bedtime to every night waking? How do I determine if he is actually hungry or if it has just become routine? He is currently teething and I know the 9 month sleep regression is real but I need help I am at a complete loss!!

    • Janelle Reid says

      @Valerie, thank you for writing to us. I am sorry to hear you’ve been experiencing frequent night wakings with your 10 month old! At this age, most babies can sleep through the night, although some need 1 feeding to get them through to the morning. Judging by the times your son it waking up, it sounds like he is waking out of habit / sleep association. Here is a link to an article with more information on that:
      You will want to create a plan to slowly wean him from the associations to teach him how to fall back asleep without them, like what you did for your initial sleep training. Here is a link to an article series with several sleep training techniques:
      Hang in there! I hope things improve for you soon! If you need more help, let us know! We have an amazing team of sleep consultants that would love to help you with this should you need more personalized advice. You can view options online here:
      Thank you for using the Baby Sleep Site as a resource for sleep!

  7. Amy says


    Thank you Janelle.
    As soon as her ear infection clears will start with adjusting her naps.
    Will keep you posted on our progress.
    Many thanks again, truly appreciate the support.


    • Janelle Reid says

      Good luck with everything @Amy!

  8. Amy says

    Hi Janelle

    Thank you so much for your prompt reply.
    As you can see I am awake and now cannot sleep…

    Just wanted to clarify : the fact she naps only once a day for 2-3hrs can this be an issue?
    She wakes so late that it s difficult to add another nap.
    Shall I avoid napping with her so she will sleep less and I can potentially add a second nap or put her to bed earlier?

    Many thanks for your help.

    Best Regards


    • Janelle Reid says

      @Amy, Thanks for replying. I apologize I didn’t address the nap in my previous comment. At this age, we would want her to have two naps, so that her wake times are not so long, but we also don’t want her to get overwhelmed with so much sleep training all at once. You may try to establish a different schedule with her naps first – a morning nap and then afternoon nap, and just try to get them to be an hour long. Once the schedule is established you may try weaning her from those sleep associations. You also may decide you want to focus on one part of sleep at a time so she does feel overwhelmed – so you may start with naps, or you may start with nights. I personally found nights were easier for my boys so I started there, but all babies are different and you can do what you prefer. 🙂

  9. Amy says

    Our babygirl use to sleep trough the night from 2 to 6 months. Then she started theething and started to wakes 3-4 times a night. After the theething she got sick for about two months.
    During that time she coslept with us, and we would put her back in her cot when she was sound asleep.

    She’s now 10months old.
    Wakes at least 4times at night.
    She fall asleep while breastfeeding or her dad rocks her to sleep.
    She never fall asleep on her own.
    Now every time she wakes she cries until I give her the breast.
    My husband sleep with her once or twice a week so I can get few hours sleep. I express milk and he gives her the bottle or rocks her back to sleep.
    She naps only once a day as she sleep more than 2hrs most of the time. But I have to stay with her otherwise she wakes within 30min.

    Her routine

    – Wakes between 9 – 9.30am
    – breakfast around 10am she doesn’t eat much ( 3-4 tsp of porridge) + breastfeeding
    – lunch at 12.15 usually eat well.
    – nap around 1pm + breastfeeding ( if I stay with her in the bed she’s sleeps 2-3hrs sometimes)
    – 4pm snack, she barely eats
    – 6pm dinner eat well
    – 7pm Bath
    – 8pm bed + breastfeeding can takes up to an hour to get her to sleep.
    – between 9pm and 12pm:
    She wakes almost every 40min her dad usually rocks her back to sleep.
    Then she sleeps until 2am, has a feed. And she can wake up like this every 1h30 -2 hrs
    Having said that she’s been poorly with an infection and nocturnal cough.

    Needless to say I am exhausted.

    How do I get her to sleep on her own and wean her from night feeds?

    • Janelle Reid says

      @Amy, Thank you so much for stopping by and using the Baby Sleep Site as a resource for help. I am so sorry to hear that you have been struggling with your daughter’s frequent wake ups, as well as her cough and teething. This can certainly impact sleep, and it can be challenging to figure out how to navigate those times when they are sick and in pain. 🙁
      Here is a link to a sample schedule for a 10 month old for your reference:
      At this age many babies can sleep through the night without a feeding, although some do still need one feeding through 1 year.
      In your situation, it sounds like your daughter has some sleep associations and when she goes through a lighter sleep cycle, she wakes up looking for that sleep association and needs it in order to go back to sleep. This is a super common problem and it can be fixed, so know there is definitely hope! Here is an article on sleep associations:
      You also may like to read through this article series with several sleep training techniques:
      If you find you want more help with this, our team of sleep consultants would love to help you! You can email us at [email protected] and we can help you find the package that will work best for your situation or you can view the options online at
      I hope you get more sleep soon! Hang in there!