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Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.
Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.
Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.

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Comments

  1. Diana says

    I think it is simply about what your baby needs. My now 6-months old is on a pretty nice schedule. Sleeping at night 8pm-6:00 am and has two naps during the day, all sleep happening in his crib. But it was not like this until about a month ago. For the first 2.5 months he wanted to nap in my arms only, could not do absolutely anything about this. Then at 2.5 months he started feeling uncomfortable in my arms, but still refused to sleep in his crib. So he was napping during the day, only in the stroller or in the swing at random times for random amount of time. Around 5 months, he started rolling on his belly, and he preferred this position to sleep and then he refused to sleep in the swing or stroller. At that point I moved him in the crib. And the moment I put him down, he goes instantly on his tummy and sleeps like that. It took him about 1-2 weeks to get adjusted to the crib, during the day but now he is fine. In the beginning he kept waking up a few times during the nap, but I went, picked him up, rocked him and then he was falling asleep again. Now he doesn’t need this anymore, he simply sleeps. Unless he is not feeling well, and that is a different story…..On the other hand he always slept in his crib at night. And 8 pm for the night was not a time that we decided on, was the time that we observed to work best for him. Basically flexibility on my side and trying to figure out what my baby needs helped me stay sane….

  2. Karen says

    I have my 8 month old on a great schedule – or perhaps it’s that he has me on a great schedule. Either way, he is a very happy baby and I get many compliments on that. However, people are also quick to tease me or at least comment on my rigid schedule. But I contribute his pleasant demeanor to his schedule. If he begins to fuss and get cranky, he’s either hungry or tired. He has napped in his port-a-crib at times when we are out also, but usually not as long as he normally would if he was home in his crib, and it also takes a bit longer for him to settle into his nap.

  3. Wendy says

    Thank you for the kind words! Much needed.

  4. Kate says

    Wendy, my heart goes out to you! I don’t have any advice to share with you(other than to try to ignore others’ non-undertanding), but know that you’re doing a great job with your daughter. You’re the one who spends the most time with her and you’re the one who knows her needs best. That’s all there is to it! I hope this helps you a little bit 🙂

  5. Emily DeJeu says

    @ Audrey — “they win if they aren’t getting what they need sleepwise” — amen to that! Yes, yes they do. Our little ones don’t exactly push through exhaustion the way we adults do (which is probably a good thing, actually).

    I’m glad to hear that you’ve made peace with your Type A-ness, and have found something that works for you. And good for you for sticking with what you know is best for your son!

    Thanks for commenting, Audrey. 🙂

  6. Audrey says

    I am a Type A, & feel a good nap schedule helped me survive the 14 months of poor night sleep – at least I knew he would nap! I have friends though that fall into the flexible category & can give me a hard time about being at home for his naps – “but don’t you ever go out for lunch?”. I just say, if I can’t do what I need to do within the 5 hours either side of the lunchtime nap I’m obviously not being efficient! Besides, if Teddy gets overtired our lives are awful until he catches up – why would I bring that onto us unnecessarily? It is funny, it ain’t worth fighting it, they win if they aren’t getting what they need sleepwise!

  7. Melissa says

    Carolyn! Silly autocorrect!

  8. Melissa says

    Thank you so much Caroline! I can’t believe I never thought to try that. I guess I’m so caught up with thinking how tired she is and needs to go to bed early. I will be trying a later time and see how she goes. Fingers crossed for a miracle lol 🙂

  9. Carolyn says

    Melissa, I hear you! My little guy is now 14 months but when he was a little younger, about 9-11 months, he would only take two 40 minute naps and would wake in the night still! It was so frustrating and I tried everything. You know what finally worked? We had to take him to emerge one evening and his bedtime ended up getting pushed back an hour and a half. This had NEVER happened before. The next day he slept 90 minutes in the morning and 90 minutes in the afternoon. So we tried a later bedtime for a few nights (we changed bedtime from 7:30 to 8:30), and the longer naps kept on happening every day! In fact, he still takes two naps at 14 months, although one of them has shortened up to an hour. I just remember being where you are and reading all about how an earlier bedtime might help baby sleep better, but I’ve found that the opposite was true for my little Wyatt. Good luck, I really hope something works out for you!
    Oh and when it comes to rigidity or flexibility, I always make sure my little one has only 3 hours of wake time between naps. So depending on when he wakes up in the morning (usually 6:45ish), his nap times will change slightly. So we work with a nice mix of flexibility and rigidity, and it works for us!

    • Emily DeJeu says

      @ Carolyn — thanks so much for sharing this advice with Melissa, and for giving her some insights into what worked for you! Very kind of you. 🙂

  10. Emily DeJeu says

    @ Wendy — here’s my two cents: it sounds like you’re doing a fabulous job. Truly. You know what works for your little girl, and you’re providing that for her – which is exactly what fabulous moms do! I’d say ignore any negative vibes coming from friends/family and keep doing what you know is best for your little girl. You’re right; she will outgrow this with time, and soon, it’ll be much easier for her to have a shorter nap, or to go to bed later than usual.

    When possible, accept invitations to things that don’t have to interfere with her schedule (i.e. events you can come to late, once her nap is done, or leave early, when it’s time for her to go to bed.) That’s a nice compromise, since it allows you and your daughter to participate in the fun without compromising her sleep.

    Hope this helps, Wendy! And I empathize with your situation. I’m 8 hours from my family, too. That distance can be hard sometimes, can’t it? But rest assured that, from what you’ve said here, it sounds like you’re an excellent mom to your little girl. 🙂

    @ Bridgette — I’m jealous! I so wish I were a go-with-the-flow kind of girl. One of my closest friends is, and she teases me about my Type-A personality. 😉

    Good for you for recognizing that your daughter isn’t as go-with-the-flow as you are, though, and for realizing that you need to accommodate her sleep needs, even though that means a little less flexibility for you. That’s a sign of good mothering! And honestly, before you know it, she’ll be done with daytime naps, and it’ll be much easier to get out of the house.

    Thanks for commenting, Bridgette!