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Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.
Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.
Exhausted and Confused?   Yes! I need help and more sleep.

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  1. Kathleen Huang says

    Please help! Our almost 16 month old baby is refusing all naps. Here’s the back story. We sleep trained him young for a variety of reasons. For many many months, he goes down at 7 and sleeps to near 7am and takes two naps, one at 10 and one at 2 for anywhere from 40-60 minutes. It is usually smooth. I put him in his crib and he falls asleep on his own. For about 4 days in a row, he refused to take either the morning or afternoon nap. In order to get him to sleep at least a little bit for some of those days, I’ve held him (big mistake! ). After the 4th day I thought, ok, this baby is ready to drop to one nap. I also knew it wasn’t good to keep holding him. So I read up on dropping naps and moved his first nap to 11 for the last few days. Every time I’ve put him down for the last few days, including at night, he is refusing to sleep. For instance, I put him in at 11 am, he’ll stand there with his blankie waiting for me to come back in. At first he might cry or whine, but after a few minutes he stops and just stands there. This happened three times the other day (I tried 10, 12 and 2). I’ve left him there from anywhere between 50 minutes to and hour and fifteen minutes. He is so tired, he’ll stand there almost falling asleep while standing but never lay down. I’ve been watching him in his crib for the last hour just standing there. I feel like he knows if he just stands there, eventually I’ll come back in and take him out. Then at night, he sat in the middle of his crib for an hour and a half dozing off before he finally fell over and fell asleep. It goes without saying that he’s a freaking mess and grumpy. Help! What do I do?

    • Debbye @ The Baby Sleep Site says

      Hi @Kathleen – Thank you for writing! I am sorry that sleep has become so disrupted doe your 16 month old! You are not alone! Toddler sleep can be so tough, so hang in there! Perhaps you’re right and he does know that you will come and rescue him if he stands long enough? This could be a good place to start and see if you can do things differently! For example, lay him back down instead of pick him up when you go in? For additional help, I would recommend that you consider our e-Book, The 5 Step System to Better Toddler Sleep. This can help now and in the future too! The book includes a number of detailed sample schedules, as well as an explanation on how to make changes in your sleep routines and schedules. It also contains several sleep planning worksheets and sleep logs.
      You can find out more about this ebook here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/5-step-system-toddler
      And there is an option to purchase with an Express Sleep Plan, which is an instantly generated plan specific to your family’s history, your family’s philosophies, and your specific goals.
      Good luck Kathleen! We hope that you are all sleeping better very soon, and are here to help if you need us!

  2. Sarah says

    Approximately two weeks ago my daughter (who just turned 5 months) has been resisting her naps and will not nap unless I am holding her. Prior to this she would take 2-3 naps ranging from 30-120 minutes. This recent development coincided with when she started teething which her first tooth came through 4 days ago.

    We started sleep training at night when she was 4 months (pediatrician approved) and has done really well. We put her down at 6:30-7pm depending on her naps that day and she will sleep until 5-6am. If she wakes up at 5am I will nurse her and she goes back to sleep until 7 or 7:30am.

    I am at a loss when it comes to naps. I watch for her tired signals—rubbing eyes, yawning, or fussiness and try to put her down for her first nap two hours after she wakes up. When I transfer her to the crib she wakes up. I give her a few minutes to self soothe before picking her up. When all else fails I put her in the baby carrier or stroller. I would much rather have her sleep then not at all. While I have eliminated sleep associations at night the doctor said to continue nursing or rocking her to sleep (during the day) and that we would review this at her 6 month visit. Any suggestions on how to get her back to her old sleeping habits?

    Thanks!

    • Janelle Reid says

      Hey @Sarah, thanks for writing to us! I’m so sorry to hear you’ve recently been struggling with naps. I personally found naps to be trickier too with both of my boys, so hang in there. Here is a link to a free guide with tips on nap sleep that may give you some additional ideas: https://www.babysleepsite.com/free-baby-nap-guide/
      It may take some time and a little bit of aging before you can get on a set schedule, but it sounds like you are doing an amazing job doing your best to make sure she doesn’t get overtired. If you want more specific help we can offer that too. We have an ebook all about naps and schedules that you may be interested in looking at for more in depth information: https://www.babysleepsite.com/mastering-naps/
      I hope this helps!

  3. Natalia says

    Hi!!
    My 13 month old baby started daycare 3 weeks ago… he’s on 2 naps a day, an hour each. At the beginning he was at daycare for 2 to 3 hours and taking his first nap over there but just for 30 mins… last week he didn’t take his first nap at all and his second nap was just for 30 to 45 mins… He seems to be ok (not fussy and he doesn’t look tired). For bed time I put him down in his crib around 5:45pm and he takes between 30-40 mins to fall asleep but he doesn’t cry, he was just talks to himself. I thought maybe he would wake up at 6:30 (hoping 12 hours of sleep at night) but he has always been an 11 hours baby and so he slept the same amount of hours even though he didn’t nap well during the day… at the weekend he took his 2 naps like normal at home… and this week he is full time in daycare and he’s not napping in the morning and yesterday his nap was just for 20 mins… the teacher at the daycare is doing almost the same routine that we do at home before nap and bed time… so I wonder if this is just because it is a new environment or maybe he’s ready to transition to 1 nap… I’m really worried because he has been ok napping at home, but everything changed when he stared daycare… any advice please!!!! Thanks a lot!!!!

    • Janelle Reid says

      Hi @Natalia, thanks for writing to us. A transition to daycare can be a lot for a baby, and it is taking place at an age where he could start to transition out of the 2 naps, but he may be doing 1 some days and 2 other days for a while as he transitions. Here is a link to a free guide with tips on naps for you here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/free-baby-nap-guide/
      If you need more help making this transition, let us know! We can help. You can read about all of our options to work one-one-one with a sleep consultant here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/baby-toddler-sleep-consulting-services/ and they will be able to look at his full schedule and help you figure out how to handle it. They often work with families whose children are in daycare as well, and know how to navigate with the daycare schedule and can give you tips for that.
      I hope this helps!

  4. Heather says

    So my 14 mo old has been fighting her afternoon nap for about a month. I know it’s a timing issue. Her first nap is 9 am (she wakes at 6 am) and she sleeps well at this nap (60-90 min) and her next nap is 1:15 pm. Some days she goes right down. Some days she fights it. Almost all days she wakes up at about the 2:30. I’ve found that if she doesn’t sleep until 3 pm she is super tired by bedtime at 6:45 and will likely wake at least once in the night. However, if she can sleep until 3 pm this rarely happens. I’ve tried moving the nap back 15 min and it is always met with 30-45 min of fussing and not napping unless I strap her on me. How can I get my child to take a good afternoon nap without fussing in the crib for 20+ min or being worn? (Even in the car she will fight this nap sometimes).

    • Janelle Reid says

      @Heather, thank you for your comment and I am so sorry to hear you are struggling with your 14 month old’s naps! My son is 15 months old and I can definitely relate to this afternoon battle myself. What’s helped me is finding the perfect schedule for my son, which can take some figuring out for sure. We have an ebook that goes into this and provides you with TONS of sample schedules to help with your nap time (which by default can often help with nights as well). If you are interested in seeing the packages we offer this ebook in, you can read more about it here: https://www.babysleepsite.com/mastering-naps/
      I hope this helps! Hang in there!